As a little girl, I used to play on this sit and spin all the time. Now, Jocelyn wasn’t quite big enough to enjoy this dizzying toy, but she looked cute trying!
O’Neill, NE. August, 2009.
More about Wordless Wednesday here.
Up to this point parenting Jocelyn has mostly consisted of keeping her alive and making sure she’s happy. Now that she’s mobile, even if it is still on all fours, I keep thinking ahead to what it’s going to be like when she’s running, talking, and getting into all kinds of trouble. This has all got me pondering what I know about parenting (which is, admittedly, not much) and what sort of parent I want to be.
I have no intention of going into any sort of diatribe about all the different philosophies about parenting, I’m no expert and don’t even know yet how I’ll handle it. People are as touchy about parenting philosophies as they are about their deepest insecurities, in my experience. I’m just trying to figure out what will work for us, or at least where to start. I do believe the wise advice I was once given, that “you can only parent the child you have now.”
No matter what, parenting children takes patience. Lots of patience, bucket loads of patience, maybe even canyons full of patience. That’s where I start to worry, you see, I’m not that sure I’m patient enough. Even now there are times where Jocelyn can be trying, and I feel my patience stretched to its limits. I’m sure this is a feeling every parent must experience. So while there’s still time, before I’m harried from chasing her around the house, and burned out from hearing her scream, I want to work on improving my patience. Patience is just a form of self-control, of reigning in one’s impulses. But how do you improve it? Put yourself in situations where you have to use it? Is patience like a muscle that when exercised grows stronger? More and more that’s the view I’m starting to take, since lots of parents have told me how much more patient they are now that they have kids. And I think I can feel it happening a little with me already. Not getting so upset when the house is less than perfect, not feeling the need to rush so much. Sometimes I’m impatient for Jocelyn to grow up, to be able to tell me what she needs, but this is what I’m working hardest to quell. I want to be here with her now, enjoy her as she is, I’m already looking back with nostalgia on six months ago when she was so tiny. I don’t want to rush this, so I need to cultivate patience. And I’m gonna need a lot of washcloths.
We’re in so much trouble.
Haven’t had much time to update the blog as of late, but thought I’d share this slide-show I put together of Jocelyn from birth to now.
Jocelyn had her first real fever this week. Took a couple days, lots of patience and napping, but it has passed and she’s doing better. A sick child is probably hardest on the parents, the feeling of helplessness and inability to communicate effectively makes everyone unhappy. I know this is one of many episodes to come, and though I wish I could shield her from every illness, being sick is good for her immune system in the long run.
Just a quick story about Jocelyn’s growing stranger anxiety. We were in the car yesterday, driving to the new Berkeley Bowl West supermarket to check it out and do some shopping. Stopped at a red light, I hear Jocelyn, who’d been happily babbling away, start that wind up whine babies do when they’re about to begin wailing. Since the light was going to be red for a bit yet, I turned around to give her a reassuring pat and assess if something was amiss. I noticed that she was staring out the window at a neighboring vehicle. The man in the driver’s seat was smiling in a very friendly manner at Jocelyn. I couldn’t keep from chuckling. Once we were moving and he was out of sight she seemed to be happy once again. Who knew a well meaning smile could elicit such a response.
She also has a new and interesting habit. When playing she likes to prop herself up on her side. To keep her balance she puts her feet in rather strange positions, crossing them at the ankles and other odd poses. She’ll keep her feet up in the air for several minutes at a time. It makes me think of the way break dancers freeze at the end of their spin moves. Since she rolls around changing sides frequently she seems like our own break-dancing baby.
She’s a good eater, and usually pretty neat, but she likes to turn her head while her mouth is open waiting for the food, this is the result.
More about Wordless Wednesday here.
Bonus picture
Foot size comparison, she’s got a lot of growing to do to catch up with Mom.
April’s mother and step-father gave us a camcorder. It does a decent job, and I recently figured out how to make a digital copy from the tape. I’m still learning, but here is our first published movie of Jocelyn. I still have a lot to learn about how to get this to work.
It takes a while to fully load, but we think it is cute. Ignore me and my unintentional Cloverfield-esque camera movement.
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